I am back home!! And back to my RIE classes.
It is always interesting to come back home after a long trip. I feel like I have forgotten my old habits. What do I usually have for breakfast? How do I start my morning? What happens next?
It is actually a good time to change some habits you don’t like so much!
And yet… you slip right back into the old routine so quickly. You kind of fall back into the old groove.
Another interesting thing about traveling is getting to see how other people live their everyday lives: their priorities, habits, hobbies, and little things that seem completely normal to them.
And then I come back to my own everyday life. I am sitting on the floor, observing babies and PARENTS. It is so interesting to see them again after some time away. And once again, I realize that I have the most amazing and thoughtful parents in my RIE groups.
Nothing Is Happening.
Three families arrive first. Parents walk in slowly and find a good spot, just as they did two months ago, so their children know where to find Mom or Dad if they need them.
Bo sits between his mom and dad. Occasionally, he looks at me. He recognizes me, yet he needs time. He doesn’t look at the toys. Almost dreamily, he repeatedly pets the shelf next to him.
Eve sits next to her dad and pulls a basket of bracelets from the shelf. She moves them around without really looking at them. Occasionally, she looks at me.
Georgina sits very close to her dad, on his lap, with her face buried in his chest.
None of the parents encourage their children to say hello to Teacher Kira. They know children need time, and they will say hello when they are ready.
Literally nothing happens for 25 minutes.
After we exchange hellos and welcome each other, we grow quiet. But there is no discomfort with doing nothing and no urge to get the children involved in an activity.
And then, after 25 minutes, things begin to unfold.
Bo gets up and finds some metal bowls. He sizes them up, fits one inside another, and makes some musical noises with them. Now he is busy and completely invested in what he is doing.
Eve gets up and joins him. They start carrying heavy bottles filled with colored water. They huff and puff and seem so empowered!
Georgina gets up from her dad’s lap and takes one step toward the toy shelf. Then she quickly returns to her dad. She does this at least five times, getting up and retreating to his lap.
I start wondering if my presence is holding her back. After a while, she hasn’t seen me for some time, so I move to another spot.
Georgina continues getting up, and each time she gets a little farther from her father.
Finally, she picks up a ball, looks at me, and smiles.
When We Slow Down, We Can See More
I think about a book by Emmi Pikler that I am reading right now. She writes about how often adults have an urge to teach, encourage, and show children what to do.
And how, through sensitive observation, we can begin to notice when to stay back and slow down, and when to engage.
Watching Georgina reminded me how much can happen when we don’t rush children. She needed time to become comfortable with my presence. And she didn’t need anyone to encourage her to come closer, show her a toy, or tell her it was okay. She found her own way, one small step at a time.
And I almost missed the opportunity to see this unfold because I was wondering whether I was getting in her way!
This is one of the things I love about being back in the classroom. Even after years of working with babies and parents, there is always something new to notice. And sometimes, the most interesting things happen when it seems like nothing is happening at all.
If you’d like to learn more about RIE® Parent-Infant Guidance™ Classes, feel free to reach out.
Wishing you all the best in this difficult yet exciting journey of parenting!
Warmly,
Teacher Kira
